Vulnerability – defined as openness about uncertainty, risk and emotion – enables leaders to connect authentically with themselves and others. When leaders admit mistakes or uncertainty, they build trust and psychological safety, paving the way for greater innovation, engagement and resilience. By contrast, a façade of invulnerability often amplifies stress and undermines both personal well-being and team performance.
Why be vulnerable?
Leaders who embrace vulnerability tend to be more self-aware, authentic and human, which strengthens their influence. Vulnerability in managing oneself means acknowledging personal limits, emotions, and doubts. This self-honesty fosters emotional regulation and prevents burnout. Psychologists note that suppressing one’s true feelings consumes mental energy and keeps the brain in a stress state. By contrast, admitting uncertainty or fear can reduce one’s own anxiety and allow clearer thinking. For example, leaders are well advised to shift from a “proving” mentality to an “improving” one – focusing on growth rather than flawless performance (mckinsey.com). Such an open mindset means leaders can “always do better” rather than pretending to be perfect. This internal honesty with oneself is the first step to managing stress and making thoughtful decisions in high-stakes situations.
At the same time, vulnerability in managing others is crucial for building trust and engagement. When leaders show they are human, team members feel safer taking risks and sharing ideas. Trust is the number-one driver of team performance, and vulnerability is key to trust.
Vulnerable leaders empathize better. When a boss shares a personal challenge or value, it humanizes them. Others feel understood and valued, which deepens loyalty. Empathy-driven leadership (a form of vulnerability) has been linked to higher morale and retention.
Authenticity triggers oxytocin release in the brain, which fosters empathy and cooperation. In practice, a leader who admits “I don’t have all the answers” invites others to contribute, lowering hierarchical barriers. Admitting mistakes or asking for help “strengthens the bonds of trust, collaboration, and mutual understanding” among colleagues. Vulnerability creates a virtuous cycle: honest, humble leaders elicit honesty and collaboration from their teams.
Who needs to be vulnerable?
Leaders who master vulnerability create more engaged, resilient teams. Leaders at different life or career stages experience and benefit from vulnerability in varied ways:
- New managers often build credibility by asking questions and admitting what they don’t know. Inexperience can actually be an asset if it’s paired with curiosity. For example, a first-time project leader who says “I’m still learning – what’s your feedback?” sets a tone of openness. Younger leaders who do this often earn respect and mentorship. In fact, research on leadership development shows that individuals who express humility early on accelerate their learning and social capital.
- For mid-Career Leaders vulnerability becomes a tool for recalibration. Mid-career leaders may face dilemmas (work–life balance, strategic shifts, or personal growth plateaus). Admitting these challenges to peers or mentors can unlock support and new perspectives. For instance, openly discussing career doubts or seeking coaching models continuous improvement. A mid-level executive confiding in their team that “I made a mistake on that project and here is how I’m fixing it” demonstrates accountability, teaching others to take ownership without fear. This stage often benefits from reflective leadership training that encourages candid self-review.
- At the top, vulnerability can be rare but powerful. Historically, C-suite leaders were expected to be bulletproof. Today’s research suggests the opposite: elite CEOs who demonstrate vulnerability can strengthen stakeholder trust. A University of Maryland study found that CEOs who show vulnerability are more likely to gain investors’ trust, even if they later share disappointing results. In practice, leaders like Microsoft’s Satya Nadella and Uber’s Dara Khosrowshahi illustrate this shift. Nadella has emphasized empathy and personal authenticity – famously saying, “Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make big choices in life”. Khosrowshahi publicly admitted “I have to tell you that I’m scared” when he announced a major career move. These admissions of vulnerability humanized them, making employees and investors more willing to follow their vision.
Each stage of a leader’s career presents different pressures and opportunities for vulnerability. Junior leaders can leverage openness to learn; mid-career leaders can use it to re-engage and adapt; and senior leaders can choose to defy expectations by sharing honestly – with potentially significant rewards.
The cost of ‘toughness’
When leaders hide their doubts or stress, significant psychological and physiological costs ensue. Numerous studies show that suppression of emotion consumes precious mental resources and triggers stress. In one laboratory experiment, individuals instructed to suppress all emotional displays during a social discussion showed clear “threat” physiology: elevated heart strain and vasoconstriction consistent with high stress. They also reported the task as more uncomfortable and intense than those allowed to express naturally, and their partners rated them as poor communicators. Likewise, a recent meta-analysis found that people actively suppressing emotion during stress tasks exhibit stronger physiological stress responses (increased heart rate, cortisol release) than controls. In other words, bottling up feelings backfires by amplifying the body’s alarm signals.
Long-term, this chronic suppression can lead to burnout and health problems. The same meta-analysis concluded that habitual suppressors have higher cortisol reactivity and blood pressure during stress. Psychophysiological research also shows that chronic stress (often from hiding true feelings) depletes hormones like testosterone and dopamine, which in turn impairs cognitive function and empathy. Practically speaking, a leader who never admits errors or doubts tends to stay in a perpetual threat state: anxious, less creative, and less empathetic. The command-and-control approach born of fear is not sustainable. For example, sustained cortisol elevation (from ongoing stress) makes people more risk-averse and less objective. It even curtails empathy: one review found that high stress diminishes the brain’s ability to read others’ emotions, undermining a core leadership skill.
Psychologically, suppressing vulnerability can erode wellbeing. Leaders who adopt “toxic positivity” – insisting “everything’s fine” – often experience inner conflict and guilt. Over time, the emotional labor of maintaining a façade contributes to burnout and anxiety. The American Psychological Association warns that constantly hiding negative feelings can trigger depression, anxiety disorders, or even psychosomatic illness (headaches, fatigue). In short, the cost of never showing a chink in the armor is steep: it heightens physiological stress and degrades mental health. Meanwhile, team members may resent the lack of honesty, leading to disengagement. The contrast is stark: leaders who admit vulnerability relieve psychological pressure for themselves and others; those who don’t bear mounting strain in body and mind.
Pretending everything is okay when it isn’t impairs performance and health. Suppressed emotions hijack the brain’s “threat vs. challenge” system, pushing people into survival mode. Over time this erodes the very capacities (creativity, decision-making, empathy) that leaders need. The science is clear: authentic leadership – which necessarily includes vulnerability – is not just nice to have, it is essential for sustainable high performance and well-being.
And in practice this means?
Senior leaders can take concrete actions to make vulnerability an active part of their leadership style. The goal is to create a culture where uncertainty and emotion are acknowledged and valued. Drawing on best practices, leaders can try the following:
- Begin with yourself. In meetings or updates, proactively share a recent challenge or mistake you made. For instance, a leader might say, “I missed the mark on that forecast because I overlooked X – here is what I’m doing to fix it.” This openness signals that imperfection is human, not punishable. Model the behaviors you want to see – if you want your team to discuss errors, you first demonstrate that it’s okay to do so. In practice, this might mean opening a team meeting with a personal story of struggle, or explicitly acknowledging when you don’t have an answer.
- Make it a habit to solicit input. When facing a tough decision, say so and invite ideas: “I value your expertise here; what would you do?” This not only leverages collective intelligence but models vulnerability. By openly stating needs (“I don’t know this area well – can someone mentor me?”), leaders encourage a give-and-take culture. Over time, team members come to see vulnerability as a normal leadership tool, not a liability.
- Create organizational norms that reward experimentation, not just flawless results. Explicitly frame failures as valuable data. For example, start team retrospectives with a discussion of “what went wrong and what we learned.” Encourage senior staff to share their own career setbacks during training or town halls. Another idea is implementing a “lesson learned” bulletin or newsletter where executives contribute their own takeaways from setbacks. When leaders visibly embrace vulnerability about failure, it eliminates stigma and stimulates innovation.
- Spend one-on-one time on non-transactional conversations. McAdoo’s recent study on vulnerable leadership found that investing personal time in team members and displaying empathy were key aspects of successful leaders. This might mean informal check-ins, mentoring lunches, or simply asking team members about their career goals and concerns. Use these moments to share something personal as well – a hobby, a challenge at home, even a little insecurities in the role. Such mutual sharing strengthens bonds and shows humility. For example, a CEO might say to a new manager, “When I started here, I felt overwhelmed by travel – let’s figure out how to make this easier for you,” which acknowledges vulnerability and builds trust.
- Leaders can build reflection time into their schedules. Techniques like journaling or coaching can help articulate personal values and fears. Then communicate these during strategy sessions. When speaking to large groups or boards, don’t just present data – also share why certain goals matter personally. Steve Jobs’s famous Stanford commencement speech is a case in point: he spoke about mortality and cancer not as a sales pitch but to convey authenticity. Leaders might similarly use speeches or internal communications to reveal a meaningful life lesson. This kind of transparency fosters deep engagement.
- Beyond individual acts, leaders should cultivate an environment of psychological safety. This includes setting explicit policies (e.g. “no blame” post-mortems) and training managers on empathy. Anonymous feedback tools can also surface issues that employees hesitate to raise. Senior leaders can ask their teams: “How would you define vulnerability and safety in our context?” to surface norms. The key is consistency: small acts of vulnerability become powerful only when they are part of a broader pattern of trust.
Dr Dominic Irvine & Professor Emeritus Simon Jobson